Vintage | Beauty

17 Horrifying Beauty Machines That Might As Well Be Torture Devices

The things people will do to look beautiful are quite intense. Over the years techniques have changed, but some of the old machines looked more like torture devices than anything else.

Could you imagine trying to use one of these? I'm still trying to master an eyelash curler let alone an entire machine to help you put on makeup! Try and see if you can guess what these machines do!

1. Is it a tiny electric chair for your hair?

Sort of! It is essentially a giant curling iron that does all your hair at once. Convenient I guess?

2. That's one way to do that..

Better than surgery I guess? This little thing would be worn at night and would apparently change the shape of your nose.

3. This looks like it is straight out of a horror movie

Apparently this horrifying machine is called a "Beauty Micrometer" which you put on your face to accurately measure your features so you know how to do your makeup in the most flattering way  possible.

4. It's a bird! It's a plane! It's...I have no idea

When you wanted to get some sun but not on your face or arms, you would wear this "Freckle-proof" cape. Stylish right?  

5. Is she having brain surgery?

Nope, they are attempting to freeze off her freckles using carbon dioxide. They really hate freckles back in the day. They needed a tube in their mouth to breathe and their eyes had to be shielded.

6. Halloween mask?

This was a device from the 1940s that heated up to increase circulation and help you look younger.

7. This just looks cold

Brr! This was called "Hangover Heaven". You could add water to the plastic cubes and freeze it and put it on after a night of partying. To be fair I bet it would feel really good.

8. Can she even breathe in there?

Turns out not really... This is called a "Glamour Bonnet" which would help you get a rosy complexion by lowering the atmospheric pressure around your face to alpine conditions.

9. This does not look comfortable

These rubber "beauty masks" were thought to smooth out wrinkles. Instead they are just horrifying. So, that is a good choice?

10. She looks so scared!

So these little vacuums are tiny suctions cups that apparently suck out your skin spots.

11. This looks like it might pinch a little

Apparently this crazy machine was found in a "slendering salon". The pieces would roll up and down your legs massaging them to promote weight loss.

12. This looks so very uncomfortable

This little device was built to try and make dimples in your cheeks.

13. This is so funny looking

I guess not everyone wanted to wear the Freckle Cape so this is the next best choice. Keep that nose sunburn free with this special shield!

14. I've seen this one before!

This big band would sit around your waist and shake it up apparently make your muscles contract so you would burn calories.

15. Is this a magician practicing an act?

Before there were the rowing machines we have now, you would attach a spring to your heels and neck and then it would simulate the experience.

16. Wow, this looks like it will totally work!

Nothing like massaging your chin and neck to reduce your glands.

17. Are they being bandaged from an injury?

Nope! This is another lovely beauty mask. I think the best part is how cute their hair looks while doing this. So classy.

Have you ever used any of these products?

Share with your friends and see if they can guess what these things really do!

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