I have two cats, and I love them more than almost anything in the world. But at the same time, I'll be the first to admit they're the biggest jerks in the world. They expect us to do everything for them, and then they get to decide if we get their attention or not.
But in the end, cats are the most lovable jerks in the world. We still love them to death, even when they...well, when they do things like this.
1. Hey, apparently it's legal in Canada now, so why not let him have this one?
2. You know, what, this isn't actually the worst strategy in the world.
3. When someone brings you a gift, you're supposed to act appreciative, even if you don't like it.
4. Again, what have we said about gifts? Always polite to at least pretend you're happy about it.
5. Alright, there's no excusing this one. Respect the fish.
6. Well, was the hamster asking for it?
7. Maybe he (or she) is just trying to make the place a little more cozy.
8. Maybe you should stop buying such delicious food. Then it might not be so much of a problem!
9. Well you never know when you might need that tissue again! Okay...you'll probably never need it.
10. Fish food addiction affects in 1 in every 10 cats.
11. Perhaps if you really cared about the items getting broken, you would leave them in an enclosed spot.
12. To be fair, if you can't clean a cat's litter box on a regular basis, then you really shouldn't own a cat.
13. Would you rather it be dead or alive? Personally, I'd be happy to get a dead one over one that could still scurry away.
14. You know what? So do I.
15. That cat must be pretty extraordinary to be able to get the lid off an urn. Maybe you should look into getting that thing on the Internet.
16. And it looks like you've learned your lesson.
17. Perhaps if we all stopped enabling cats, they wouldn't act like this. Of course if won't happen...but one can dream.
18. How much toilet paper do these people leave in one place??
19. It's unclear whether this is an act of aggression, or a type of peace offering towards the toilet.
20. I could be wrong, but a solution to this would be closing the door to the washing machine.
21. Can't blame you. I probably would, too.
22. This could be the start of something special, and you could be getting in the middle of it.
23. Hey, putting it in the bag is way better than letting it loose around the house.
24. Close the door if you don't want this to happen. You've brought it on yourself.
25. Who can resist some bread? I know I can't.
26. If you own a cat and you're not smart enough to put things you care about away, I think that's on you.
27. Sounds like a regular Paula Deen!
28. I want $300...
29. A cat that can break a laptop? Those are some mighty teeth you have.
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