Is your husband helping you out with the chores at home? If he isn't, it might be time to talk to him about the marital benefits of splitting the in-house workload. Results from a combined study between researchers from the University of Missouri, Brigham Young University, and Utah State University, were published in the Journal of Family Issues last month that prove that married couples are far happier when the household chores are split equally between both parties.
It's true, men aren't necessarily raised to appreciate just how much work goes into keeping a house neat and tidy, especially when children are added to the equation. For decades (and dare I say centuries) chores around the house were considered "woman's work," and we are slowly starting to see that preconceived notion change.
The study by the three combined universities looked at heterosexual, married couples (mostly) between 25 and 30 years old, who had at least one child. Of all the couples included in the study, roughly forty per cent of the women involved had some form of employment.
A few stark conclusions came out of the study. One, when the woman of the relationship sees that her husband is doing his fare share of the household chores, the couple is much happier as a whole. Two, the couple also saw success when the woman in the relationship believed that the husband was close with the children. Three, when a couple does chores together, the woman is far happier with the division of responsibilities.
This isn't a new discovery either. In a 2007 Pew Research Poll, it was shown that one of the top three issues that surround making sure you have a happy marriage revolved around splitting up the household chores. The other two issues were faithfulness and whether the couple was having good sex. Funny enough, men were seen to benefit from having a more frequent sex life when they did more chores, but only if those chores were considered traditional "man tasks" like yard work or "fixing the sink."
There are some helpful tips to getting your husband involved with more of the traditional "female" household duties.
If you want your husband to take more responsibility around the house, there are a few different things that you can do to try and make it happen.
1. Just ask him to do it.
Don't ask in a way that makes him feel inferior, but ask in a loving and respectful manner and they are more likely to feel inclined to pick up the slack.
2. Make it appear that you need help with a task.
Chivalry isn't dead, but sometimes you need to try and coax it out of your husband, especially if things have been far to comfortable for him for too long. When he knows that you need help with something he is far more likely to jump in and try to be a part of the solution.
3. Have a real conversation about the housework, and be open to both sides of the conversation.
Men aren't known for their emotional prowess. They would often hide how they are actually feeling than come right out and talk about it. So when you are speaking to him about the issues around the house, try and make him feel like part of the solution, not part of the problem.
4. Don't be over critical, but make sure he understands your point of view.
A sure fire way to make sure your husband feels dejected in his role as part of the marriage is to be overly critical of his work (and this of course goes both ways, he should never make you feel inadequate either). If he has an idea or suggestion about how he could get more work done, don't shoot it down until he has had a chance to give it a try, it's about compromise.
How do you split up the chores in your home? Let us know in the comments.