People love to enjoy their alcoholic beverages. There's a reason we call a short window after the conclusion of the workday happy hour. What's better than drinking with friends after a long day, you may ask? We would answer that being able to do so for free is pretty awesome. People don't spring for open bars for no reason, carelessly throwing most shreds of self-control to the winds of Bacchanalian revelry. Ha! The National Survey on Drug Use and Health found that 86.4% of adults have tried alcohol at least once in their lifetime. What they didn't include in that study is that 100% of drinkers (probably) agree that free booze is the best booze.
A police department in Pennsylvania apparently hadn't thought of this before they offered a spot for people to come to get drunk at the station so fledgling officers could practice field sobriety testing in a controlled environment. For free. Personally, we don't think the respondents got past the free alcohol part and the response spoke for itself.
The department posted on Facebook seeking three volunteers for the prestigious positions, but there were a few requirements that needed to be met first.
The volunteers must be between ages 25 and 40 and without a history of drug or alcohol abuse. No criminal history. They had to sign a liability waiver and have a responsible (read: sober) party to pick them up after volunteering. And, finally, they had to "be willing to drink hard liquor to the point of inebriation." It's safe to say the Kutztown Borough Police Department didn't do a great job of narrowing down the pool of applicants.
A security officer makes an average of $30,000 annually in the United States, compensation that runs along the lines of many law enforcement officers. So, perhaps the departmental budget had certain constraints because they also specified that volunteers wouldn't be paid for their time, but the booze would be provided. The collective reaction from the masses that responded can be summed up in a few words: "That's good enough for me!"
And they certainly responded in kind. In the community with a population around 5,000, the Facebook post was shared more than 1,400 times and had hundreds of comments. Naturally, the public commentary was hilarious. One person even asked if there was an area to spectate. Americans catch a billion colds every year but rarely catch the chance to get drunk for free in the name of aiding law enforcement. Members of the community certainly decided it was worth the time and potential hangover. They were jumping at the opportunity to be one of the fortunate three volunteers.
In 2017, there were 662,390 police and sheriff's patrol officers in the United States. This is a number that's on the rise. It's nice to see that plenty of volunteers exist to support the training of these officers. The DUI test training won't take place until April, but after the massive response from the community and the viral response from the nation, Kutztown Borough announced that they needed no more volunteers. In all caps, no less.
"THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR INTEREST IN HELPING US OUT! WE HAVE HAD AN OVERWHELMING RESPONSE FOR THIS AND AT THIS POINT WE HAVE ENOUGH VOLUNTEERS FOR THIS TRAINING!" the updated post read. Sometimes one must emphasize a point.
Much to the dismay of thousands of other hopefuls, the lucky three have been chosen. Only time will tell if their identities will be revealed when the trial takes place.
Bringing a different meaning now, to protect and to serve in the land of booze will draw the attention of thousands.