Please take a minute to think of what your favorite crime could be. If you could commit one crime, reap the rewards, and never experience the consequences, what would you do?
It's tricky, because you'd have to live with whatever you choose for the rest of your life. So it would need to be rewarding, without being something too awful.
Thieves in Germany managed to commit my ideal crime, by stealing over 20 tons of chocolate, most of it Nutella.
Police say a large truck went missing last weekend, containing primarily the chocolate-hazelnut spread.
Now, think about this for a minute. If the thieves tried to profit off their Nutella haul, it could be a SERIOUS pay off. Let's do some quick math.
A 368g jar of Nutella costs on average $3.50.
There are 18,143,000 grams in 20 tons.
That means you could make 49,301 jars of Nutella with that supply.
At $3.50 a jar, you're looking at $172,553 worth of Nutella. Barring, of course, you don't eat any before it hits the shelves.
And while the crime itself is pretty hilarious, the response from police is actually what got people talking.
Among the Nutella, there were also Kinder Eggs and other various chocolate products on board the stolen truck. Police believe the truck was most likely towed away by a larger truck.
“Anyone offered large quantities (of chocolate) via unconventional channels should report it to the police immediately,” German authorities said in a statement.
Um...what? What constitutes an 'unconditional channel?' I can't picture someone walking up to you on the street with a long trench coat filled with chocolate.
Police are also warning that this incident is not isolated by any means. Another truck was stolen last week, but the thieves were in for a bit of shock when they discovered it was empty.
All I'm saying is that if someone approached me and offered me free Nutella or Kinder eggs, I would not think twice. Does that make me a bad person? Maybe. But it also makes me a bad person with a tummy full of Nutella.
So what do you think? Have you been offered any chocolate or Nutella through unconventional channels recently? If you see something, say something.